“What is true is already so.
Owning up to it doesn’t make it worse.
Not being open about it doesn’t make it go away.
And because it’s true, it is what is there to be interacted with.
Anything untrue isn’t there to be lived.
People can stand what is true,
for they are already enduring it.”
We can’t move forward unless we know where we are. We can’t navigate our desires and insecurities unless we see them clearly.
Honesty is simultaneously obvious and tricky. A lot of clients I work with add a negative spin to things when I ask them to try to be particularly honest. This is in part because when our parents have told us to “be honest,” it was often because we were hiding something— or at least they thought we were hiding something.
Being honest— especially with ourselves— should feel like relaxing into a comfortable chair. You no longer have to keep holding up a front or facade. You’re just looking at and acknowledging what is.
Rarely in our culture is honesty used in the context of a loving and safe space where people can express themselves authentically without the fear of misunderstanding or judgment. But it’s precisely this kind of honesty that I want to focus on developing, and next we’ll explore what that means.